WRITINGS RELEASE

Oh the joys of writing.  How a whole new world can live inside your head just waiting to come out and have its story be told.  It can be anything you want it to be.  Tragic, romantic, humorous, and even educational can all live in your head.  People wanting to be known are in your head, ready to get out and have a life.  The sweet feeling of escape as you begin to write the story of the world in your head.  How so simply or complicated your story is, it doesn't matter.  It's the world you created.  Every person, every city, everything is yours.  Make it what you want.  No one tell you what to do and no one to tell you how good or bad it is.  Just you and your thoughts on paper becoming a story and becoming real.  Writing can be personal and help you vent.  It can be something made up completely.  The release of writing can be better than even the best therapy.  

SWEET STRESS RELIEF

Nothing says stress relief better than playing some of the best Disney songs on the piano.  I kid you not, it's like a freaking therapy session.  Sometimes, however, I get too busy and can't make it to my musical therapist so what's the next best thing you might ask?  That would be blasting my music so loud in my headphones so that I can block everything else out.  When that doesn't work there is always television or internet right.  Sadly virtual reality is almost always better than facing everything that life has to give you out there in the real world.

SUMMERS END

Ah summer; a time of warmth, relaxation, and peace.  Sadly, however, even this blissful time must come to an end.  We remember with fondness the way the sun would feel on our face, and how we stayed out without worrying about homework and things of that nature.  Still good things come from the summers end.  After all we see the beautiful trees change their colors to shades of red, brown and yellows.  We see our friends on a more regular basis and meet new friends as the year moves on.  Fall brings cool weather and beautiful scenery.  Though nothing can compare to a warm summer evening. 

COLLEGE LIFE PREVIEW

Man, I can't believe that I've got one more year of high school left.  My senior year starts in 8 days!  It's crazy to imagine.  I do have my college plans in order now.  I'm planing on mainly Utah State University, but since it's not a good idea to put all your eggs in one basket my back ups are Snow College and Utah Valley University.  I took a tour of USU a few weeks ago, and I fell head over heels for that place!  They are so student oriented!  Which is really great for me.  Plus the shuttle system around campus and free around town bus rides I'll be savin on gas and won't have to dress for the ice age just to walk around campus.  Well, maybe I'll still need to dress for the ice age since it gets really cold up there.  Just weird to think this will be the last year of living under my parents roof.  Crazy life right?

UP AND UP

Well things have been going really well for me recently.  I am going to prom with a friend of mine named Seth Mellott if any of you know him.  Bought my dress a few weeks ago and it is so pretty.  You wouldn't think so if I just described it, and since I don't know how to put pictures on here I will say its straight down black and white and straight down with a tie in the back.  I would have gotten a bright green I fell in love with, but sadly it was barely too small and I could barely move in it.  But it's okay because I'm gonna get bright green accessories and Seth will have a bright green tie; so I will still have my share of green.  Last we talked we were gonna do laser tag for our day date.  Still not a hundred percent, but I sure hope so!  Laser tag is so fun!  Choir tour was amazing! We went to Disneyland, and I got a pretty good tan.  Plus I went on the Ferris Wheel, which is a big deal for someone who doesn't like heights like me!  I also went on Indiana Jones, Pirates of the Carribean, Little Mermaid, Monsters Inc., Thunder Mountain Railroad, Space Mountain, Finding Nemo, Whinnie the Pooh, Silly Symphony Swings, the Zepolines, Haunted Mansion, Teacups, Gadgets Go Coaster, Tritans Merry Go Round, Toy Story Mania, and It's a Small World.  I had so much fun!  The five other girls I roomed with were so awesome! Totally respectful, honest, and so fun! People on my bus, yes even the adults and driver were super awesome!   They were funny, cool, and just awesome really!  I'm using the word awesome allot aren't I? Lets see, what's another word for awesome?  Oh, fantastic, wonderful, and amazing.  There we go.  Anyway, for the festival up there, Chamber Choir got a perfect score, Advanced Women's took first in our division, and Acapella got third out of nine spots with the lowest being excellent which is still really good.  American Fork's most advanced Chamber Choir beat us by half a point and Orem's choir beat them by another half a point.  So as you can see it was pretty close competition.  This has never happened before the announcer said.  So we were pretty dang awesome this year!  Go Utah choir!
Another great thing that has happened, my parents are in debate about getting me my own car.  We talked about it yesterday, I'll need another job to help pay for everything, but that shouldn't be a big problem.  I hope anyway, so if anyone knows anyplace hiring lemme know! So, yeah that's about where things are.  My job at the Cinemark is going well, and yeah.  I'll have better stories next time.  So for the long wait in between posts.

MONSTERS

"Just give up.  It's not worth all the fighting.  Just give in and everything will be easier."  A voice in my head says to me.  I've been fighting for what seems like forever.  In reality it's only been about a month and a half.  My energy is running low.  It's been getting stronger, and I've done nothing but get weaker.  How could that be?  I've been doing everything I was supposed to.  Executing the right moves and using the right tactics, but nothing was working.  Sometimes it seemed to only make things worse.  It wasn't fair.  I'm trying so hard; nothing seems to be working.
"I can't give up.  I wont give up."  I say back hoping my voice isn't as weak as it sounded to me.
"You are pathetic.  You think you can win with all of these stupid and moronic mistakes you have made?  You're even more foolish than I thought!"  He chuckles at my misery.  How one being be so cruel and heartless?  I can't let him get in my head.  I have to keep him out!
You can't keep out what's already here you silly girl.  Did you think you could ever beat me?  You are sadly mistaken.  I know everything now.  Everything is becoming so clear.  Oh you poor girl so full of false hope. 
He was in my head.  I have to get him out.  I don't know how but I have to.
This monster can't stay here forever.  Eventually he will have to get out.  I have to kill this monster.  No matter how hard it may be.  He must be gone if I ever want this nightmare to end.

SONGS IN REAL LIFE

Now I want you all to look at this song.  If you have heard it, awesome, if not pay close attention to the words.  I have not been able to stop listening to it for the longest time! I'm so in love with it.  Not just because it's from Taylor Swift, or because its the theme for the "Hunger Games" movie coming out.  These words don't just explain what happens in the movie but also have a real world connections.  Part of these lyrics and can seriously to what not only is going on out there in the world, but also some parts of my life.  This song speaks nothing but the truth.  I seriously recommending reading these lyrics before listening to the song.  You'll, in my opinion, get allot more out of it than getting caught up in her voice.  
I remember tears streaming down your face
When I said, I'll never let you go
When all those shadows almost killed your light
I remember you said, Don't leave me here alone
But all that's dead and gone and passed tonight

Just close your eyes
The sun is going down
You'll be alright
No one can hurt you now
Come morning light
You and I'll be safe and sound

Don't you dare look out your window darling
Everything's on fire
The war outside our door keeps raging on
Hold onto this lullaby
Even when the music's gone
Gone

Just close your eyes
The sun is going down
You'll be alright
No one can hurt you now
Come morning light
You and I'll be safe and sound

Just close your eyes
You'll be alright
Come morning light,
You and I'll be safe and sound...   

ALONE

You know how you make all these fun plans with your friends and you're so excited and nothing goes right when the time comes.  Well ladies and gents, that was this night.  I had plans with a friend to go to a basketball game.  This person told me she was definatly going, but when I text them when it's time to meet they are having second thoughts.  Ouch.  Then I had plans to go to the stomp with my boyfriend.  Well circumstances just working against me made it impossible for him to come.  Now I'm certain what happened there isn't towards me, but in the other case I'm not so sure.  Maybe I had it coming, I don't know.  All I do know is, due to the fact I'm a very easy crier, I sat on the bleachers watching people dance around with thier friends and having a ball.  Now, maybe I am being overly dramatic, maybe I'm just being the average over emotional teenage girl, but either way, today hurt.  I'm sure it wasn't on purpose, but it sucked none the less.  So thanks karma or whatever you are for letting me have a perfectly, lonely friday night. 

YOUNG LOVE

How is love defined?  Well the true definition of love, to me, is something that cannot be put into words or feelings too strong for words alone.  Brad helps me understand those feelings. 
Hanging out is so much fun!  Namely when we watch How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days.  You know which part I'm talking about.  I love how he makes me feel so happy and amazing.  Love you Brad!!!!
Oh how there is no definition for young love.

LOOKING TO THE FUTURE

Today was SEOP's for Juniors this week and mine was this morning.  After a few set backs I finally met up with my councillor to discuss my last year of high school.  Everything went well, I did get a sucker.  Some sad news though, need another P.E credit and after that nothing else but a relativley easy senior years.  Thank gosh for online school.  I'm thinking of also doing Financial Literature online to avoid a semester of boredum.  That really sounds tempting, I think I will.  See this is why I love writing!  I figure out so much stuff from doing it!
Anyway, I'm absolutley petrified of the future.  Within the next two years, I will be going off to college.  I'll be leaving the place I have lived my whole life.  Sure maybe soon it'll be more exciting the closer it gets, as of now it's frightening. 
I wish I could go back to the days of throwing caution to the wind.  Racing bikes up and down the street.  Ah the good old days.  Not worrying about anything, but what we were going to eat for dinner. 

TRIALS

Wow, it has been a while.  Sorry, school's just been keeping me so busy I haven't really had the time to update anything.  I promise I'll start getting more on top of it. 
Anyway, these past few weeks have just been hard.  Loads of stuff I have been having to deal with half of it school, the other half work.  So let's see where to begin....
Lets just start off with school.  Well I took Precalculas thinking, it won't be too bad.  Just a little harder than Algebra 2 right?  Wrong big time! My teacher did warn us at the begining of the year you needed a B average to pass Precal; I got a C average.  First term wasn't too bad, I managed a C.  Second term, on the other hand, was a D-.  Want to know how I managed to borderline pass?  I'll tell you.  The last test of the term, I was super confident I can totally pass!  I had an F from the previous test I compleatly failed.  This test all I needed was a 50% to pass.  The test finished and I was feeling less than confident.  I knew I could at least get a D on it.  On Sunday my teacher posted the scores.  I sacanned down so very eagerly to find my score.  There it was, 37%.  My heart sank, I had failed Precal.  I was crushed.  I logged off waiting for my mom to see it.  My brother is the first person I saw.  I told him to come over so I could show him and ask him what Mom would do to me when she found out.  I logged back in and there it was a D-!  It went up!  I was so happy!  I passed, just barely, but still passed Precalculas!
So with one tragedy down time for the other one to begin.  Last Friday I was on my way to work at JCW's.  I walk in to the back room where our assignments are for the day.  I look the list over a couple times and notice my name's not there.  So I go find my boss to see if it was just a mistake or if I wasn't supposed to come in today.  I find him and he says,"Go out and wait for me I need to talk to you."  So I went to sit in one of the booths.  My heart was racing, all I could think about was one word.  Fired.  I sat and waited patiently trying not to let the fear show on my face.  My boss comes out and sits down. 
"Now as you know we have been having allot of employees asking for more hours when there aren't any to give.  Chris and Clay have told me that we need to lay people off.  Taylor, we are going to have to let you go."  My heart sank, me being an easy crier when it came to bad news like this couldn't help but shed a little tear.  He went on to say how I was improving and how I needed to come in and collect one more check on the 26th.  He then asked if I had any questions.  Through the tears I tried to manage a smile and said, " Know anywhere that't hiring?"  He smiled and suggested Subway and other than that he didn't know.  I left with tears overflowing in my eyes. 
So if you know anywhere that is hiring in the Pleasant Grove, Lindon, and or American Fork area, please let me know as soon as possible.  Thanks. 
Everyone's got trials, but not everyone can overcome them.